got bananas? make banana bread

ours were about to go south and since we paid up for them we may as well get some use of out them. it was raining and generally poopy outside today, so why not bake? i dug around for a good banana bread recipe, but needed something all fell into the ‘low-fat’ arena too. i came across this one and it seemed to foot the bill since the only ingredients i needed to buy were eggs and buttermilk.

i tweaked mine, obviously since i can’t leave well enough alone, and added some cinnamon and supplemented the white sugar with brown. it’s in the oven right now and it smells damn good. will post pics once it comes out and is not hot as hell. the real test: tomorrow. if it tastes that good, if not better tomorrow then i have a winner on my hand.

i love mine with a hit of nutella on the side.  soooooo good.  oh and if you are going to use the recipe above, add some extra banana, like half a cup, to really bring out the banana goodness.

taste test: burger king flame broiled potato chips

i’m just gonna put it out there, the flavor term ‘flame-broiled’ is fairly ambiguous and could mean just about anything. the ketchup and fries flavor seemed rather straight-forward by comparison. however, before ripping into the bag, i’m going to make the assumption that the ideal taste they are going for is like biting into a fresh whopper. that being said it’s now time to close my eyes and open my mind. here we go again.

in the bag: the chips are uniform, again. this time instead of being like fries but thinner, they are perfect circles (like a burger). i bet some manufacturing genius got a sweet bonus for coming up with that connection. the smell really is no different than a regular bag of barbecue potato chips. i am underwhelmed so far. really nothing more to see. i am eager to get to the taste.

crunch time: my first thought is that is does, in fact, taste like a burger from bk.

taste test: burker king ketchup & fries potato chips

holy crap!! i hit the gas station mother-load!! coming off of 12 hours of driving in 60 total hours we turned off the interstate to fuel up. after holding my breath and dealing with an odor that can only be described as ‘a baby diaper full of curry’ in the bathroom i headed out into the main area to get a bottle of water and see what odd atrocities i could find. i scanned the chips and suddenly my eyes widened as i came across a bag of something i have never seen before: burger king potato chips. i was scared and intrigued all at the same time when i grabbed a bag of the ketchup & fries flavor. this would prove to be a great thing and a scary one all at the same time.

p.s. i searched like crazy for these on the interwebs and info is sparse. however after some digging i came across the manufacturers website and found some nutritionals for you to peruse. onto the review.

taste test: archer farms smoky bacon and cheddar crisps

that’s chips to us on this side of the big pond. well i guess in a marketing effort to distinguish fried potato chips from baked potato chips they are calling the baked variety ‘crisps’. in any case these are baked and are purported to be low-fat. let the games begin.

taste test: trader joe’s nonfat organic vanilla yogurt

i have been looking for a lower cost solution for my yogurt needs since i realized that my monthly spending on stoneyfield farms banilla yogurt (no that’s not a typo, it’s vanilla and banana) had gotten rather excessive. on a recent binge shopping spree to tj’s i decided i would try something new. i made a purchase of trader joe’s organic nonfat french vanilla yogurt (goddamn that’s a long name). to be objective i decided i would evaluate it on a couple of different levels: by itself and with granola. seeing as how the majority of us eat it with something i though this was beneficial.

don’t go shopping at trader joe’s while hungry

this is a cautionary tale. yesterday i happened to be out and realized we were out of delicious fiberful bars and thought i would pop on over to trader joe’s. this turned out to be a disaster as you can see from the photo below. realizing what i had done only when i got home i decided it be best to take a picture of it to immortalize my stupidity. however there is some lemonade to be made from these lemons: i have new products to review.

to list exactly what i got:

• 2 bottles - 3 buck chuck chardonnay
• 2 bottles - gabbiano rosato (it was $2.99 per bottle, possibly for sangria)
• creamy corn & roasted pepper soup
• italian blood orange soda
• tj’s baked pita chips with sea salt
• tj’s nonfat vanilla yogurt
• box of tj’s fig cereal bars
• 3 - boysenberry fruit bars
• 20 - (yes that’s right, i have a problem) fiberful bars

so like i said, i have much to review. after some snacking on the pita chips with some hummus i was impressed. full review to follow. needless to say i might have to either not shop when i’m hungry or boycott tj’s all together and join a support group for help. i choose the former.

first seeds placed in ‘doomsday’ seed vault

does this look like it will save the world in the event of a massive holocaust?

aside from polar bears, the small arctic island of svalbard near the arctic circle off norway has a new resident: seeds. it’s buried deep in a fjord near the arctic circle and it’s being called the ‘noah’s ark’ of the 21st century.

here’s the gist of it: because the place is so goddamn cold and desolate they have dug deep (over 400 feet) underground and created a vault that will house seeds from all over the world for as many plants and crops as they can find. the idea being that once we undo ourselves (and at this point it’s only a matter of time) and the bomb drops killing many things including crops; the seeds from these crops are retrievable thanks to this underground vault. if it is a known crop, they are getting the seeds. the very first seeds were placed in the vault today kicking off what is quite possibly one of the most important acts of preparation ever.

i for one think this is a massively brilliant idea. you can read more here.

i’m cheating on my girlfriend

it’s true. there’s a love in my life that is now moving in on her territory. i’m cheating on my girl with: pastrami. yes dear readers, it’s pastrami. that delicious variant of corned beef (which oddly enough after a lifetime of hating i am starting to enjoy). i’ve had a love affair with pastrami for some time now but only now is it really creating a stronger food-hold on my heart. oh i could profess my love for pastrami endlessly but i will share a brief foray into the factory store of a popular meat business instead.

emeril sells his soul to yet another devil

the ap is reporting that his royal bam!-ness emeril lagasse has signed a deal with martha stewart living omnimedia inc. the deal is reportedly worth $50m ($45m in cash and $5m in stock). she does not however get control of his empire of restaurants. this is actually the second time he has sold his soul. the first time he sold it to the scripps media empire.

after the food network and scripps had grown tired of his shtick and wanted to renegotiate when his contract was up in november talks ceased and he is out of the network just like the orange clog wearing mario batali. emeril, i wish you the best, however make sure martha gets her ‘pound of flesh‘ otherwise her goons might come after you. consider yourself warned.

des moines bacon festival

oh no, it doesn’t stop there. now i love pork fat as much as the next guy and i told my lady that if she rubbed a little prosciutto on her neck and wrists she’d be up for promotion at work in no time. in any case leave it to the fine folks in des moines, iowa to put together the greatest festival of all time: the blue ribbon bacon festival. now this isn’t just a bunch of people getting together to eat pork and sing songs relating to pork, no. this is just as much about pbr as it is about bacon.

here’s what’s in store for you at the blue ribbon bacon festival: a lecture on bacon, a bacon eating competition, $1 pbr pulls (that’s drafts for the uninitiated), a bacon tasting and other activities that the use of alcohol combined with bacon and local & state laws allow, each person gets a bacon bracelet and a t-shirt to commemorate the event. (though i think their next cholesterol test should serve that purpose)

i for one will be there should i be able to get clearance from my cardiologist, trainer, my lady and be able to find some other deranged people to join me. for complete details see the des moines register. hope to see you there. and if i am there i will hopefully throw caution to the wind (whatever the hell that means) and sack up for the bacon eating contest.