it’s 9:15am and i walk into the local unemployment office.  yeah, i’m laid off, so what.  the sad part isn’t that i’m laid off, no the sad part is that as i walk in and fill out my obligatory form i look down on the sheet and realize i’m number 117 in line.  yep, 117.  they started with 1 and were somewhere near 12 when i arrived.  thank you government workers.  now i have nothing against these people, i just have a beef with everyone else that’s there at the same time.

i can take being number 117, i can take the mixing smell of body odor and deep fryer oil, i can take the crying babies and obnoxious ringtones that are played too loud by people who can find their fucking cell phone when it rings, and i can take the fact that it’s standing room only and that i didn’t bring a book.  fuck me.  what i can’t take is the stupid people who march right up to the counter, interrupt the person who decides whether or not to give you money (brilliant fucking idea asshole) only to utter the most despised words at the unemployment office: but i only have a question.  

hey rim job, we all have questions.  all 117 of us, we all have questions, that’s why we’re here.  do you think for a second i would be here if i didn’t need the money?   i don’t care that you think this is bullshit, we all do, all 117 of us.  i don’t care that you don’t have time for this.  do you think any of us do?

i’m reminded of fight club when this is happening.  you know what asshole: you’re not different, you’re not unique, you’re an individual and you certainly aren’t special like you’re mother kept telling you all those years.  you’re a number just like me.  now grab you’re number, sit down, turn off your cell phone, shut the fuck up and wait you’re turn like the rest of us.  

and for the record: it took 4 hours, to the minute, for me to get to speak to someone.  what did that amount to in monetary terms: the equivalent of $2.87 per hour.  yes, i make per hour somewhere between what soldiers and prisoners make, though with less chance of death or anal rape.  for that small bit i am somewhat grateful.