congratulations not on being good enough to make it to puerto rico. congratulations not on making it into the final round of top chef and the chance of winning more money in one day than you would in 4 years as a chef. no. you get none of those.
to illustrate my point i will use a reference from a favorite african safari of mine. imagine you are in a jeep seeing a pack of zebras grazing in the marsh only to get spooked by a lion. the zebras all proceed to turn and run as the lion swiftly approached. they race away and quickly the hierarchy of the zebra is splayed for you to see. the fastest move with reckless abandon and escape without ever having felt the lions breath. at the back of the pack is antonia, she is the slowest of the zebras and will be the sacrifice. however, not anywhere close to the front of the pack but just barely ahead of antonia is lisa. she is that second-to-last zebra.
she’s not a winner. she’s not even close. she’s merely a bit faster than the slowest zebra and has once again escaped impending death. congratulations on not being a the loser. you certainly didn’t win.
oh and blais and stephanie aren’t mean: you’re a fucking bitch who always has to go against the grain. you shall reap what you sow.
