editor’s note: please do not send me your facebook details and ask me to delete your account.  i won’t.  on second thought i will, if you would like, but it will involve $500 cash in small, unmarked, non-sequential bills paid directly to me for my services.  instead, please see my original post about how to delete your account.  your mileage will vary.  best of luck bitches.

wow. okay that was way more difficult than it needed to be. apparently the privacy at facebook dot com email address is the one you need to use to get through. after the initial email spelling out my intentions my inbox greeted me with the following message:

Hi trixareforkids,

If you deactivate your account, your profile and all information associated with it are immediately made inaccessible to other Facebook users. What this means is that you effectively disappear from the Facebook service. However, we do save your profile information (friends, photos, interests, etc.), so if you want to reactivate at some point, your account will look just the way it did when you deactivated. Many users deactivate their accounts for temporary reasons and expect their information to be there when they return to the service.

If you do not think you will use Facebook again and would like your account deleted, let us know, and we will take care of this for you. Keep in mind that you will not be able to reactivate your account or retrieve any of the content or information you have added.

what did you not get from my first email? did my title, permanent account deletion request, confuse you? how much more transparent can i make myself. i don’t give a shit what others users do and that they expect their information to be there when they return. seriously? people do that?

ah, wonderfully today i my inbox greeted me with a notification from the people at facebook telling me that my profile had been deleted and my email was removed from the login database. success. i am free. to mark fuckerberg: i will sleep better at night knowing that i contributed to undermining your $15B valuation.

*the author of this post is not one of those bullshit armchair quarterbacks who hates on the people who create technology because deep down inside they are pissed at themselves because they couldn’t come up with it on their own. i just don’t like how hard it was to do something that should be easy. and the use of capital letters is only from a cut and paste of the email. later bitches.